Flavored Bacon?

I accidentally got maple flavored bacon, as I grabbed some bacon after going through Walmart's bio-weapons testing area. Hormel wasn't doing me any favors, since this bacon is in similar packaging to their more normal bacon. Anyway, I decided to try it.

The smell of synthetic maple on this stuff is incredibly strong. It's like Pine-Sol suddenly decided to come out with a new product called Maple-Sol. The smell intensified when I threw it in the pan. Additionally, I felt a sense of psychic torture; when I hear bacon frying, I naturally expect to smell bacon frying, not a maple scented industrial solvent!

Man, this is so wrong. This is wrong like hazelnut flavored coffee is wrong. If you want maple syrup on your bacon, be a man, and pour it on yourself! Some poor pig died to become bacon and we need to show some respect. Bacon should taste like bacon. Create strips of maple flavored mosquito repellent out of cardboard or soy protein if you must, but leave the bacon alone!